There is Going to be a New Man in the House. Well, Almost a Man.


It’s official.

My daughter’s 8th birthday dream has come true. Her dream…a dog.pp-blog-web-ashton

Not clothes, or a new bike, or even a vacation to Disneyland in Orlando… or Disneyworld… I can’t remember which is which.

Of course, this is her dream, not ours.

Her mom and I have lived through the dog stage(s) in our lives and now enjoy the freedom that comes with not having a dog.

Our only child doesn’t seem to understand these freedoms.

Kids these days.

My dreams are simpler. Like more naps. Or more time to nap.

She seems to think that she has her whole life ahead of her and wants to experience different things (including smooching on a dog).

I am happy to help provide her with these things; I just need to know if I will be able to work in a nap before, or at least after these experiences.

My daughter is very patient, but she wants a dog. And she wants it now.

Me. I want her to have a dog, but when it’s warmer outside. And soccer and softball are over. And as soon as we have finished our vacation.

And when she has graduated college and lives in her own home.

After much discussion, she got her way. I am starting to see a pattern in our discussions, but that is another blog.

She says she deserves a dog, because she is an only child. I have offered to get her a brother and a sister, but she doesn’t want them touching her stuff.

Evidently, she prefers a dog laying, slobbering, and shedding on her stuff.

She also wants a dog that will watch TV with her, walk her to church, and lay on the driveway while she shoots baskets.

Oh, I about forgot. She really wants a dog that will lie beside her bed when she is sick.

She doesn’t want her mom or dad when she isn’t feeling well, she prefers a 4 legged beast with big ears and questionable hygiene habits.

After searching (and procrastinating) for several months, we have finally found our new family member.

And when I say family member, I really mean new King of the Household.

I think we have made a good choice. We debated on saving a dog from the pound, which we have done in the past, or buying from a registered breeder.

Turns out we got the best of both worlds.

We found a year and a half old beagle through a breeder. He needs a home because while he was a show dog, he outgrew that job, literally.

So to go along with my unemployed daughter, I now have an unemployed dog.

Little does he know that he has hit the doggy lottery.

He is leaving a kennel of 40 hard-working show dogs to move in with us. He will now spend his days watching Nickelodeon, eating treats, and getting his belly rubbed.

This is one lucky boy. He is about to live the life I used to have.

The only downside for him (there are lots of downsides for me) he has to visit the vet before he can move in with us.

For the “procedure”.

Yes, that procedure.

The vet is going to rip his manhood away from him.

As a guy, I feel badly for him. Not the best way for us to start our relationship, but I can’t have him spreading his manliness all over the neighborhood.

So in 2 weeks, the new man of the house will be here. Well, part of a man.

And I will be moving down the family pecking order. That’s the bad news.

The good news… MY manhood is still fully intact.

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