Everyone knows That Kid.
The one who started causing havoc the minute he came into the world (odds are he slapped a nurse in the maternity ward).
His poor parents have convinced themselves there was some sort of mix up at the hospital, and they brought home the wrong child.
On several occasions they’ve even tried to give him away.
To no avail.
I shouldn’t say “him”, but let’s be honest. 99% of the time it’s a him. (could be a girl… actually, no it couldn’t)
If you don’t know the student I’m talking about, you aren’t in education.
Or you’re a liar.
Every school district in the world has That Kid.
His parents couldn’t leave him with a babysitter because he always attacked them. Or ran away (I mean the babysitter, not the kid).
He got kicked out of preschool.
On the first day.
He’s the one who caused untold emotional damage when he first stepped foot on school grounds.
Sadly, registration will never be the same.
After meeting him, the secretaries immediately called the kindergarten teacher and said… “Retire. Retire now. Before it’s too late.”
That Kid is the one who does exactly the opposite of what his teacher tells him (which makes me think you should just tell him to do the opposite of what you want).
He doesn’t follow directions, he can’t stand still or be quiet, and he touches everyone and everything.
He also cuts in line, gets in trouble in the bathroom, cafeteria, and on the playground.
And can’t find his pencil.
Or pen, papers, book bag, coat, locker, or classroom.
He always needs a Kleenex or wants to go to the bathroom.
He consistently asks you a question about the exact thing you just explained.
He makes indescribable animal-like noises at the most inappropriate times.
Teachers cringe at the mere mention of him.
The pray years in advance they don’t see his name on their class list.
They are willing to promise the principal, superintendent, secretary, the custodian, and God they will do anything… anything at all if That Kid isn’t in their class.
And guess what happens.
That kid is always in their class.
And when he is in your class, everything you’ve heard about him isn’t true.
He’s much, much worse.
Now you pray harder then ever. You pray he will be gone on Mondays.
And field trip days.
And when you have a sub.
And every other day.
But he never misses school.
Unprepared, but he’s always there.
It’s like you’re being punished.
But you aren’t.
You see… every class has That Kid.
Just like every class has a Tall Kid, Smart Enough to Be a Doctor Kid, Athletic Kid, Mortal Lock to Be Prom Queen Kid, Thinks They’re Always Sick But They’re Not Kid, Only Child Kid, Cool But Doesn’t Know It Kid, Shy Girl Kid, and Funny Enough to One Day Be on Saturday Night Live Kid.
Classes are always different, yet they are always the same.
If That Kid happens to move out of your school district (he won’t, I’m just using this as an example), there is another That Kid waiting.
Impatiently, but he’s waiting.
You see, there has to be a That Kid in every class.
It’s the law.
If you don’t believe, ask any teacher if they have a That Kid.
Because they will all say yes. Right after they stop twitching.