Email iz ded, Old ppl. (Version #1- Texted- For the Kids)

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The Kids With Their Texting... What Will They Think of Next?az parNts we nEd 2 undRstNd dat email iz fst BcumN an out of D8 teknoloG (d kds dEz dAz don’t roL w d email). teknoloG iz changing, & we (old people) can’t possibly kEp ^. kds nEd somTIN faster & rght nw it iz txt msgN.

f U R foolish Enuf 2 tink dat emailing frm yor desktop iz kEpn ^ w d tImz, I M bout 2 GIV U som bad nuz, old prsn.

My six-year old skul LuvN, SpongeBob watchN (evry episode @ lEst 39 times- I M ded serious), bYk riding, roller blading, giggling ltl 3:o) knOz mo bout teknoloG n d 1st 6 yr.z of her Lyf, thN I knew aftR getin my Master’s Dgre frm a somwot accredited uni..

We nEd 2 cum 2 grips w our futR. az parNts, we R raising a smarter, mo advncd race of ppl whuz onlE purpose on erth iz 2 replAc us.

un4tuN8ly, ther iz Nuttin fune bout DIS. f U R rEDN DIS blog, ther iz n doubt dat U R old & out of D8. evN wen we tink we R cutting edge w our email, mAbE evN a laptop, our ceL phones- we R faLN farther & farther Bhind n UzN teknoloG Ech & evry dA.

We R Pac-Man n an iPod wrld. We live n d presnt, dey (d nu advncd race) R LernN 4 d futR.

dEz v smrt, v ltl ppl R grON ^ n a dfrnt wrld. dey hav n knowLdG of rotary fonez, Y calculators wer kewl, typewriters, Donkey Kong, Polaroid cameras, 8 track tapes, metL ice cube trays, o Y ther wer fone booths @ d gas statN.

dEz kds wiL nevr hav a checkbook, L%k @ a (o) 2 teL tym (dey uz thR ceL phones), coRec thR own spLN on a writiN assignment, o knO d fear of wot wiL hpn @ om f dey R snt 2 d principal’s OPIS @ skul.

dey wiL nevr remMbR a wrld w/o MySpace, iTunes, Facebook, o YouTube.

We R so out of tuch dat students tAk [abc]N, 10 yr.z aftR dey R 1st on a cmptr.

It iz tym 2 admit it. We R old. Not jst a ltl old, I mean rly old teknoloG wise. d wrld iz changing qixlE. It hz advncd since I stRtD typing DIS blog, 3 mins ago (I typ fst; n my previous Lyf I wz a [abc]N Teacher).

yung ppl R not onlE smarter thN we wer @ d sAm age, bt dey R smarter thN us nw. & dey R getin smarter. & smarter. & smarter.

We hav n choice. az elderly adults, we must b proactive. We must git out of thR way b4 dey (d sml people) crush us lIk bugs. It iz tym 2 run & hide & sAv wot ltl prId we hav L.

I M goin 2 lEd d chRj. I M getin out. It iz official, I M dn. n mo blogs. d NXT tym U rED DIS blog it wiL b typed (o possibly voiced) by a technologically advncd six-year old.

She can’t Dcide wot she wiL blog bout. She hz it narrowed dwn 2 dat cinematic classic- hI skul Musical 2, o mAbE a blog bout d world’s greatest ;-o, Justin Timberlake, o mAbE d best invention n d lst twenty-five years- Webkinz (it’s g9, stuffed animLz + cmptr website).

whIl she iz doin dat, I M goin 2 wrk on d VCR- it hz Bin 12:00 pm n our living r%m since we bought d LUG machine 9 yr.z ago.

My dAutr wz goin 2 hlp me, bt she nEdz 2 post an assignment on her claS Wiki (f U R old, U R goin 2 nEd 2 g%gle Wiki…that iz ok…I did).

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2 Responses to “Email iz ded, Old ppl. (Version #1- Texted- For the Kids)”

  1. Jackie
    on Sep 18th, 2007
    @ 5:47 pm

    I so need the laugh today – thank you!

  2. Harry
    on Sep 13th, 2011
    @ 12:24 am

    This is so funny… though in reality, it can be quite hard to read and understand :P

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