How Do You Hide in Plain Sight?

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As I get ready to change jobs something has occurred to me.

No, it’s not the daily opportunity to shove the Evil Spawn into a locker (although this does sound enticing… and may just happen at some point).You Can't See Me.

It’s the fact, I will be living in the same town where I work.

This is unprecedented.

Not for normal school administrators.

For me.

I’ve always lived in a different town from where my school has been located.

This may seem odd to some, but it’s worked for me.

It was nice to drive away each night and leave my troubles behind.  At least until my cell phone rang.

Funny how trouble knows my number.

Now, I no longer have that advantage of anonymity.

But I do have the opportunity to go to school with the Spawn (the odds of her ever getting asked out on a date have just dropped dramatically).

Like so many things in life, there’s some good and some bad.

On the upside, I will be living within one mile of my schools.

On the downside, I will be living within one mile of my schools.

I’m not going to lie, I’m a little concerned.

Proximity may not be my best friend.

This makes me wonder how I will ever get away.

Disappearing is a possibility.

And I’m not above faking my own death.  Although it will be much harder once the authorities read this blog (like anyone reads this blog…).

Maybe it’s just me (but I’m guessing it’s not), but when we go on vacation I’m always struck by how easy it would be to just disappear.

Find a small town.  Find a job.  Live under the radar.

Stay out of bar fights (easier said than done).



I bet this happens more than we know.

But how does one do this in daily life?

How do you work as a superintendent and be a parent without being consumed by school every second of every day?

Is it possible?

Or am I setting myself up for another extended period of insanity?

Should I get my fake ID’s in order (I wish I had a dollar for every time I’ve had to do this)?

Should I ask to be put on the substitute teacher list in Jordan, Montana (see I just picked this off the map… I’m telling you it’s not that hard to disappear)?

Is this my only chance of peace and quiet?

Subbing in a town you’ve never heard of.

Or can you live and work and continuously bother the Evil Spawn in one town?

I guess time will tell.  And by then the spawn will be 30 years old and still single.

In the meantime, I’m not the only one who needs to hide.  I measured her locker this morning and I’m pretty sure the Evil Spawn will fit.

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9 Responses to “How Do You Hide in Plain Sight?”

  1. Michelle Howell-Martin
    on Jun 18th, 2011
    @ 1:22 pm

    Yes, get those fake ids in order! I once ran into a student at an airport an hour and a half from our school–it really stinks to have to always be on your best behavior!

    P.S. Run, Evil Spawn, run!

    Michael Smith Reply:

    @Michelle Howell-Martin, She’s slow.

    Really slow.

  2. Cyndi
    on Jun 18th, 2011
    @ 1:57 pm

    I live in one town and teach in another. Twin cities. However, we once had a superintendent whose wife lived across the state with the children. He left evey weekend. Even when he didn’t, he would do his grocery shopping in the next town. Even though he had lots of good ideas, people talked about how he was not part of the community. Proximity is very important in the classroom and I suspect the same is true of superintendents.

  3. Carla
    on Jun 18th, 2011
    @ 6:48 pm

    I once took a position out of town and was miserable for the entire year. It wasn’t the work or the people; I loved them both. It was not being a part of the community. I am back in my own community and I see students and parents from time to time, but I love watching them grow and being where my children are. You will love the new experience! Amazingly, people like to see and talk to you for who you are and not always about school.

  4. wozza
    on Jun 19th, 2011
    @ 12:31 am

    I suspect this is a male fantasy, Mikey. Thems with bumps need the nest. But we are like THE BOSS who “got a wife and kids in Baltimore, Jack, I went out for a ride and I never went back, like a river that don’t know where it’s flowing…”.

    It’s that outlaw, pioneering spirit, I think, or the need to roam away from home to bring back the lunch.

    Anyway – I’m with you Sundance! Saddle up the palomino.

  5. Tim
    on Jun 19th, 2011
    @ 6:13 pm

    You could try this…

    Or just become an eventide hermit.

    G’luck to you!

    Michael Smith Reply:

    @Tim, I will try anything that makes me better looking.

  6. Alfred Thompson
    on Jun 19th, 2011
    @ 9:11 pm

    As if you really think it is a bad thing that you daughter will not get a date until she goes away to college! Ha!
    The rest of it I buy. My wife, and I and our son have always lived in different towns than we teach/taught in and those times we visit stores in the towns we teach remind us why that is a good thing. Not that the kids are bad of course but you don’t always want the attention – nor do the kids. Don’t ask about parents though – officially they are all wonderful too.

  7. Van S.
    on Jun 25th, 2011
    @ 11:46 am

    HA… let us know if you are able to hide.

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