Merry Christmas from The Evil Spawn and Buddy the Dog.

The Evil Spawn has been working with Animoto in her mom’s class.

Christmas + Buddy the Dog = One Proud 4th Grader (mom wants you to know this is a practice project).

As her dad (and one-half of her gene pool), I’m also very proud.

So from everyone at the corporate headquarters… Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

And Happy Festivus.



You wouldn’t know it from this video, but Buddy is actually awake from time to time.

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Santa Claus Came to School Today.

Santa Even Brought Rudolph.As the title of this blog hints (very subtle don’t you think), Santa came to school today.

He showed up right on time for school. No fake notes from a doctor, or weak excuses about being sick from a parent (or grandparent, significant other, or neighbor).

He didn’t sleep in and arrive to 1st hour 20 minutes late just because he had a game last night.

He didn’t have the bass on his car stereo cranked up to the setting labeled- “scare the old lady across the street so she calls the high school office and complains”.

He didn’t squeal his tires or drive too fast in the parking lot.

He didn’t leave the front door of the school open so that all of the cold air comes rushing inside.

He didn’t leave his hat on as he came down the hallway (he is surprisingly polite).

He didn’t walk right in between two teachers trying to hold a conversation (again polite).

He didn’t need to leave the classroom every 3 minutes to use the restroom.

He didn’t show up with his homework only half completed.

He wasn’t difficult at lunch or at recess.

He didn’t have a problem keeping his hands to himself, slamming his locker, or pushing in line at the water fountain. No bumping into his buddies as they walk down the hall.

He didn’t forget to bring those papers to the office that we sent home so mom and dad could sign.

He didn’t speak in class before raising his hand.

He didn’t act rudely or speak poorly to other students.

He wasn’t difficult with the subs and he didn’t try to tell them his name was U.R. Gross, Seymour Butts, or Jim Shoes.

And most importantly he remembered to turn his cell phone off so that it didn’t ring in class.

Actually, he didn’t do anything wrong all day. Santa was a model student. If every student acted like him, all administrators would soon be unemployed.

The only thing Santa Claus really did (besides everything right), was take one long look at the teachers, janitors, cooks, secretaries, administrators, and everyone else I just forgot to mention and shake his head.

He asked if he could address the entire group. I agreed even though a fat, old guy in a red suit in school seems a little odd to me. (Anyone who spends that much time with deer and elves kind of gives me the creeps.)

But who am I to judge?

We were all on the edge of our seats as he began to speak.

He said, “You look worn out, tired, exhausted, mentally fatigued, and just maybe you all are on your last ounce of patience.” He is a very perceptive man. I couldn’t have agreed with him more.

Then he said, “Why do PE teachers wear shorts in the winter?” I had no explanation for him. But I am getting off the subject.

Then he announced that the best present he could give us was the next two weeks off. We get to spend the time with our families and not supervising hallways, lunchrooms, games, or going to meetings.

I love Santa, although would it kill him to throw a winning lottery ticket my way?

So, as I begin my break, the staff of (me) would like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah or Kwanzaa, and most importantly a very enjoyable Festivus (a holiday for the rest of us).

Now it is time for the airing of the grievances (Google it or click on Festivus for a more in depth explanation).

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If This Offends Frank Constanza, I Apoligize.

Frank Costanza From Seinfeld.Is it politically incorrect to be against widespread political correctness? I feel like as a society, we have to apologize to everyone for every thought or comment we might have as individuals (before I go any farther, my apologies to people who strongly believe in political correctness).

What has happened to our country? We used to be all for one and one for all. We were stronger as a group when we pulled in one direction and didn’t stop every two minutes to see who might be offended (my apologies to those of you who don’t like groups and prefer individuality).

Now it seems that if 1% of a group is offended by something, they expect the other 99% to also by offended (sorry 1 per centers as I don’t want to make you mad).

While I agree that everyone has rights, I believe that people abuse their right to be offended. Some things are truly offensive, but others are just small annoyances that we have to learn to deal with as we go through life. The trick is knowing what is truly offensive (I hope I didn’t just offend magicians).

When a small group tells the other 99% of us that we can’t do this, or say that, or act a certain way- aren’t they infringing on our rights?

You may be wondering why I chose this topic on which to write a blog…well…another Halloween season is just about here and a principal was telling me that she is catching heat because her school still allows their students to dress up. A group from the community is pushing her to celebrate a Halloween alternative called Fall Day (apologies to supporters of Winter Day, Spring Day, and Summer Day for not mentioning you in the previous sentence).

In schools, it has become politically correct to not allow students to celebrate Halloween.

Because as we all know, every child who was allowed to dress up at school in the last 50 years has turned out to be a devil worshiper (if I offended Devil Worshipers, please accept my apology because that certainly wasn’t my intention).

The small percentage that is offended by what Halloween used to be hundred of years ago, now wants to dictate how kids interpret the holiday and how it should be celebrated in 2007.

I may be going out on a limb here, but I don’t think a 3rd grader dressing up like Batman will affect the way he looks at organized religion for the rest of his life (please accept my apology Superman, Spiderman, Green Lantern, and the Incredible Hulk- I just thought Batman was funnier).

In 2007, Halloween is now about costumes and candy. That’s it. Things change with time and Halloween has evolved over the years. As adults we shouldn’t put thoughts in our children’s heads other than the basic truth. Halloween = Candy + Costumes (and a couple of junior high boys who keep teepeeing my yard- I know who you are and where you live-my advice is be afraid, very afraid).

As adults, we should be able to recognize what Halloween has become, and I think 99% of us do. Unfortunately, 1% doesn’t. They seem to yell the loudest and want to tell the rest of us that our kids shouldn’t observe Halloween (if I just offended loud people, I didn’t mean too).

Individuals who don’t like Halloween seem to be okay with Easter. People who don’t like Christmas enjoy Hanukah. I have noticed people in England don’t seem to care for July 4th. War objectors probably don’t celebrate Veteran’s Day. And all of this is fine (I truly hope this paragraph wasn’t offensive to Christians, Jews, people from England, George W. Bush, or Veterans).

Wouldn’t it be okay if we just acknowledged what others think is important? We don’t have to agree or celebrate their holidays, but we also don’t have to ask them not to celebrate.

Maybe we should drop all of the holidays and force children to only celebrate Festivus Day, a holiday for the rest of us (if you have to Google this, I am terribly sorry about your entertainment choices- by the way..sorry Yahoo,, MSN, AOL and Dogpile).

Now that I have aired my grievances, let the feats of strength begin.

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While this site operates with the knowledge and awareness of the Tuscola CUSD #301 School Board, Tuscola, Illinois, the content and opinions posted here may or may not represent their views personally or collectively, nor does it attempt to represent the official viewpoint of Tuscola CUSD #301 administrators or employees.