Death, Taxes, and Hotel Workout Rooms.


There is very little you can count on in this world.

Politicians.  Nope.

Tiger Woods.  I don’t think so.

Anything good on TV.  Probably not (I think we need more channels).I Need a Fancy Excercise Outfit.

Swine Flu sweeping the country?  Not this year (or ever).

But all is not lost.

Even in 2010, you can still be sure of 3 things.

One, you will die.  I’m not exactly sure when or how, but it will happen (sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you are better off hearing it from me than some random stranger…).

Second, every government body known to man will tax you until you are beyond poor (and then when you run out of money, they will try to raise your taxes).

Third and most importantly to me, when you enter a hotel workout room it is a 100% mortal lock guarantee you will see a couple of things.

As you enter the surprisingly small room with a very strange smell, you will instantly notice the piece of workout equipment you want to use is broken.

You want to ride the stationary bike for 60 minutes before your big meeting?  Sorry, it won’t start.

Want to spend some time on the treadmill to relax before a presentation?  I don’t think so, because it needs to be repaired.

Simply want to lift weights to relieve some stress?  Not today, half of them are missing.

It never fails.

The other thing you will ALWAYS see in a hotel workout room is someone “working out” who has never “worked out” in their life.

You can recognize this person by the fact that they spend most of their time trying to figure out how to start each and every piece of exercise equipment.

They pretty much just wander around for an hour (often in a very sheik sweat suit).

When they do figure out how to start a machine, they “workout” hard for 4 minutes.

After they finish, they sprint to get a drink of water like they’ve been in the desert for 17 days.

I like it when life is predictable.

I would like it better if I was immortal and didn’t have to pay taxes.

These two are important because I will never find a stair stepper that works when I need one.

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Travel Does Stink, but Alan November was Great.


Mr. Alan November.I survived my first business related travel experience. Barely. There were a couple of bumps in the road (get it… travel… bumps in the road… you don’t get this type of 5th grade humor just anywhere… well, maybe from a 5th grader), but for the most part the trip was okay.

And by okay, I mean just okay. As in I didn’t die or cry myself to sleep. Not that I slept well in a strange place.

I still don’t understand how people do this all of the time. The hotels, finding someplace to eat, the hotels, the messed up routine, and the hotels. Did I mention the hotels?

It is just not natural to sleep in someone else’s bed. Especially if 1,237 “someone’s” have slept in that same bed before you. And by sleep, I mean… well, never mind because if I say it you will never go back to a hotel (and I could open myself up to legal proceedings in Alabama…. so says the PrincipalsPage.com legal department).

So, I will keep these thoughts to myself, much like I try not to think about how many students and parents touch the door handle of the school office on a daily basis.

While I was at the conference, I decided to ask salespeople (did you know salespeople in Latin means; evil bloodsucking devil children? I’m serious… Google it) who were there how they liked traveling for their job.

They all had the same attitude when I asked them questions about business travel (I not only have a Blog; I am a miniature Ron Burgundy).

The nice salespeople (not really… see devil children) got a glazed look in their eyes, cocked their heads to the side, and mumbled something to the effect of, “Travel is okay and I never get tired of breakfast at McDonald’s, dinner at Applebee’s, cold showers, and sleeping in a disgusting hotel bed.”

The glazed look told me they would rather be home with their families.

I felt the same way after only a couple of days. I missed my wife, my unemployed daughter, my pillow, my bed, my shower, my computer, my refrigerator, my TV, and my routine. I even missed school (any chance that changes by about 8:27 on Monday morning?).

But the important thing is I survived.

One good thing that came out of the week was attending a conference presentation that was actually good. And not just good, but great.

I listened to Alan November for 2 hours. It seemed like 12 minutes and 14 seconds (I have a stopwatch in my head).

He talked about the future of education, technology, and how as administrators we need to change the way we think about teaching our students.

This includes classroom technology, the internet, teacher evaluations, testing, length of class periods, etc. He has a strong belief that educators should be using resources that allow them to interact with teachers and students from all over the world; not just down the hall.

As an administrator who has the opportunity to sit through 37 meetings a week; this was the best presentation that I have had the pleasure of hearing.

He had just the right amount of information, sprinkled with a little sarcasm and just a hint of anger.

Who am I kidding? He may be my biological father (I wonder if he has an alibi for New Year’s of 1967?).

Anyways, he was excellent. After sitting through 14 sessions, this was a welcome and much needed surprise.

Our school district won’t be able to implement everything he talked about at once, but we can work towards it slowly but surely.

I was so excited after listening to him, that I briefly considered flying to Boston to thank him. Then I remembered the hotel bed thing.

Maybe I will just call. Or Skype. Or maybe, he can just read this blog.

He is correct about one thing; the world is getting smaller. And the people that understand this best are our students.

I wonder if they understand the hotel bed thing.

If you get a chance to hear Mr. November present, run don’t walk. You won’t be sorry. Unless you have to stay in a hotel.

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While this site operates with the knowledge and awareness of the Tuscola CUSD #301 School Board, Tuscola, Illinois, the content and opinions posted here may or may not represent their views personally or collectively, nor does it attempt to represent the official viewpoint of Tuscola CUSD #301 administrators or employees.