That Sound You Hear is Mom Doing a Very Secret/Disturbing Dance.

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Mom and Dad Are Happy!As the holidays come to a close it is time to take a look back at what we have just experienced.

This is a special time of the year because families get a chance to reconnect. Everyone slows down for a few days and spends time with their loved-ones.

While everyone gets excited about the holidays, nobody looks forward to this time of year more than moms.

All over the world, mothers get excited to have their kids home for some quality family time.

Children are out of school and on top of that… no homework! (this excitement goes for kids and moms)

But now the presents have been opened, the dinners have been eaten, and the time together has worn our mothers out.

It is now approaching every mother’s favorite time of the year. This only happens twice each year, so that makes it even more special.

School is about to be back in session. The holiday vacation is coming to a close. This is an exciting day for mom. Not quite as special as the end of summer vacation, but close (the end of summer vacation is like mom winning a $100 million dollar lottery; the end of holiday vacation is like winning $75 million).

Moms haven’t been this happy since their pregnancy was over.

Sure, all mothers love their children. They gave birth to us after all, but enough is enough.

They have cooked, cleaned, wrapped presents, done laundry, gone to the grocery store 119 times, picked up after us, and heard “I’m bored, there is nothing to do” one too many times.

On the outside, they express their love for their children. But inside, they are saying “Get Out and Don’t Let the Door Hit You In the ….” Moms can have quite the mouths on them.

Students have asked me about why the holiday break is a couple of weeks long. This is an easy one to answer and my answer is always the same.

That is the maximum amount of time moms can take their own evil spawn before they become physically violently ill at the mere sight of them. No one wants to see their mother have a meltdown, but if the holiday break was one day longer… well all I can say is, “It wouldn’t be pretty.”

Moms love their kids, but even they have their limits.

They act like they don’t want us to have to go back to school, but as soon as the front door closes behind us… they do a very secret moms’ dance (there could possibly be gyrating and pelvic thrusting so please don’t try and picture this… if you do go blind the legal staff says I am not liable).

I have often thought that moms with kids in school should buy presents for their child’s teacher after the break instead of before.

The quality of present would go way up. And I am talking 60 inch flat screen TV. Minimum. Maybe more, depending on how many siblings and arguments took place over the break.

Nothing like mom spending two weeks with her own kid(s) to put things in perspective.

You may be asking yourself… “What about Dads?”

Dads don’t care. We have garages to hide in.

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2 Responses to “That Sound You Hear is Mom Doing a Very Secret/Disturbing Dance.”

  1. I Hate the First Day of School. But I Have Yet Another Plan. | PrincipalsPage The Blog
    on Jul 20th, 2009
    @ 6:54 pm

    [...] are generally excited to be back in a routine (even if they don’t admit it), parents are unusually excited for the students to be out of their house (they can’t wait to admit it), and the teachers are [...]

  2. My School Year Has Lasted Forever, and That is a Very Long Time. | PrincipalsPage The Blog
    on Jul 21st, 2009
    @ 8:19 am

    [...] since I was the only father at the Girl Scouts Orientation Meeting. Or at my Senior Prom when I was fast dancing only to realize 25 seconds into my flailing the DJ was actually playing a slow [...]

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