As I push mowed my lawn this weekend, it occurred to me that politicians are setting terrible examples for our children.
Since it takes me forever to mow, I started thinking about all the politicians who have failed us.
And not just with their policy judgment.
I’m talking failing us by having no moral compass.
When I was a kid, the list was two.
Richard Nixon and Gary Hart.
That was it. Or at least that was all we knew about.
Now, every day brings another moronic situation where a politician has done something so immature it would cause a 7th grade boy to shake his head in disgust.
President Bill Clinton.
Governor Mark Sanford.
Senator John Ensign.
Senator John Edwards.
Representative Anthony Weiner (that’s his name… really…).
Governor Eliot Spitzer (also a real name…).
They all have one thing in common. Besides being male (which may explain the immaturity and bad judgment), they all lied about what they did.
Isn’t this the 3rd rule you learn in kindergarten?
After “share with your neighbor” and “raise your hand before talking”?
It usually works like this.
Politician does stupid. Lies about stupid. Continues to lie about stupid.
Holds a press conference in regards to stupid.
Tries to talk wife into attending said press conference.
Half-heartedly apologizes for getting caught. Begs for forgiveness. Promises not to do stupid again.
Or at least promises not to get caught doing stupid again.
Gives the look of shame (see picture above).
And repeat with next idiot politician (they don’t seem to learn how to avoid stupid from each other).
My question is what will elected officials be doing in 20 years?
Now it’s girls and Twitter.
By then it could be robbing liquor stores and stealing cookies from Girl Scouts.
These people need to be stopped, but there are just so many of them.
I’m starting to feel overwhelmed.
They are everywhere.
It’s the same feeling I get when one 2nd grader asks me to open their juice box and before I know it I’m surrounded by 127 juice boxes (these kids are like cicadas).
I just need a moment to get my thoughts together.
And also remember how to shove that little straw into the tiny juice box hole (this is NOT a euphemism on politician behavior… although it could be).