You Are Weirding Me Out.

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This happens more and more often.Weird.  Really weird.

Okay.  From time to time.

Alright.  It happened once.

I was standing by myself.  Minding my own business.

I was attempting to avoid any interaction with society.

As usual, I was avoiding any and all forms of human contact.

And then it happened.

Someone mentioned a blog I’d written.

Like I’ve actually read them.

It’s weird.

Kind of like the feeling you get if you accidently put on someone else’s underwear (awkward!)

Or instead of using toothpaste, you accidently grab a tube of Preparation H.

Or sharing a bathroom (think about it… it’s unnatural).

Or like when you go outside to get the mail only to realize you’ve forgotten pants (these examples are hypothetical… as far as you know).

It’s not right.

When I post a blog, I believe I have every right to think no one ever reads them.

I am pretty sure this is in the Constitution (note to self… Google Constitution/Blogs).

I don’t want to seem ungrateful, so it’s important you know I don’t really mind being asked about this blog.

But you have to understand something…

I don’t read what I’ve written

Never have.  Never will.

So when questioned, I could give a thoughtful answer about how I had carefully considered and researched the issue about which I had written. But that would be a lie.

Truth is, I probably slopped something down (like I am doing right now) and never gave it a second thought.

Or sadly, a first thought.

So if you have questions, fire away.

But I can’t promise I have any idea what you are talking about.

Because I barely have any idea what I was talking about.

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2 Responses to “You Are Weirding Me Out.”

  1. wozza
    on Jun 27th, 2012
    @ 4:48 pm

    And in the spirit of weirding you out – I am off soon to become your Chinese correspondent. New job as Academic Director of a language school in Wuxi. I’m hoping your missives will get through the stringent Chinese media interweb folk. If not – bah!

    Michael Smith Reply:

    @wozza, You are my hero.

    Be safe.

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